Sunday Rant!

First I need to apologise for not writing as much as I said I would but I've got  that age old excuse that I've been busy.... busy with ummmm well what's that thing called, the thing that gets in the way of all the awesomeness and great adventures... oh yeah I've been busy with LIFE... living my life with my mini me at my side....

-- my mini me, my constant companion, the sunshine in my life and the subject of today's rant.. SOPHIA (insert scary slasher music here...)

As much as I love Sophia, this deployment is getting old, and the new phase of her not sleeping even older.... we have moved on from the "no cry sleep solution for newborns and babies" to the "no cry sleep solution for toddlers and preschoolers" which should be re-titled "the no cry sleep solution for anyone over the age of two who likes to keep their parents on their toes" - as we know, children are constantly evolving and changing, exploring and growing, so what may have worked for months on end no longer applies, you have to stay one step ahead, changing it up and starting all over... it's exhausting.  But the lack of sleep even more so.

It's all my fault (something the book tells you not to say (out loud)EVER) My mother warned me not to have an August baby, my whole life was one BIG warning.  My sister was an August baby, and she was a complete pain in the arse (and when I say "was" I mean "is" and when I say "pain in the arse" I mean "complete fucking nightmare") August babies are stubborn and contrite, needy and narcissistic, if you say it's black, they will swear up and down that it's white... Sophia is an August baby.

So getting back on topic, SLEEP or lack thereof is my rant for today, Sophia has got in this terrible habit of sleeping really well until I go to bed, I don't know if she senses it, or it's suddenly quiet in the house, but about 30 minutes after I'm in bed.. Sophia is in my bed too (yes we're still doing that terrible thing of mid-night co-sleeping - stop judging me and get off my blog).. and she sleeps soundly next to me until about 3am, and then the fun begins, she wakes up, she's thirsty, she wants the dog, she wants her doll, she wants her clothes off, she wants them back on, she can't keep still, she can't get settled.. on and on and on. The biggest thing is that she physically can't keep still, she can't sit still during the day and evidently this is mirrored at night.. she's kicking and wiggling, squirming and flailing.. usually in my direction.. she can't keep to her side (well Josh's side) of the bed.. she has to be right up on me..

"The Book" suggests introducing a "lovey" I laugh in the face of a lovey.. we've had a blanket with a tag, success for a few days, we've had a taggie (about a million little tags sewn around a fleece) not successful at all.. we've had a baby doll, occasional success, but by far Sophia's favourite "lovey" is ME - more to the point my face... Sophia spends hours each day and night caressing my face.... awwww how sweet some of you might say.. to that I say NO... it is not sweet.. it is horrible.. she likes more than anything to "fiddle" with my lips, brushing them with her fingers, pinching them (this hurts), picking them (this hurts too) you may think I'm being mean or being a baby about it.. but it's insane... and until you've had multiple hours of someone constantly having their hands on your mouth... you don't know squat.  (August babies strike again - my sister LOVED to stroke my Mums hair when she was tired/going to sleep) So my lips get sore and chapped and still she continues, what can you do.. slap her little hand away, take it away over and over.. because she laughs, she gets even more persistent.. almost hurting me on purpose... so "Book" NOW what do you suggest!?!!??!?!?

This whole loving on my face is relatively new... she didn't do this as a baby.. she didn't touch or fiddle.. she just slept.. and she slept fine with me.. I want to go back to those days... but we have to go forward.. there is no choice.. so join me on this turbulent journey as I work through "the book" getting her to sleep through the night in her bed, then getting her to stop loving on my face and eventually getting her to go to sleep by herself... it's not an easy fix, it won't happen over night.. but slow progress is what I expect.. after all you don't see many college students heading off, not potty trained, drinking milk out of a bottle and sleeping in their parents bed.. we'll get this licked (hopefully before college!)

p.s. I need to also appologize for the terrible spelling in this piece.. I hit spell check and it highlighted every.single.word. WTF? FML!